There are a lot of people out there who are unwilling to take the time and effort to find the truth about school. These people want you to tell them what they want to hear, which is why we refuse to indulge them any longer. Cornell is not just any old university and it’s time for us all to face reality. Business minor cornell is not everything it’s cracked up to be. The truth is, once you graduate and actually start a real business, all will be revealed.
A lot of you are great students and we don’t want to discourage you from going to business school. However, let us be the first to tell you that once you graduate, what exactly will you be doing? Sure, there are a lot of corporate jobs available out there. But can anyone explain to us why every job requires a specific set of skills that has little direct correlation with business education? I’m pretty sure they teach something like “marketing” in business school, but what else do they have in common? The truth is that the jobs offered are generally not real opportunities and we would strongly advise against wasting your time trying to find one.
1. The “Business” You Will Be Doing Is Selling.
This is what your business degree will really be trained for. Every job out there requires sales skills, regardless of whether or not you are in sales. The only thing more important to an employer than your ability to sell is the willingness to work for peanuts. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise..
2. Your Degree Is Irrelevant
We’re pretty sure that you’re going to have to have a business degree of some sort in order to get any job at all, but that’s about all it proves. We can’t explain why employers demand these degrees and are willing to pay for them, but we can tell you that it means absolutely nothing once you actually get the jobs people are hiring for. It has been said that companies hire people who remind them of themselves and this is probably the only thing they will see when they look at your resume. If you happen to be a white male then good luck.
3. The Average Salary Is Terribly Low
If you’re a young person looking for a job and you graduate from Cornell, then good luck finding work. Say what you want about the economy and about the high unemployment rate, but there is one thing we are sure about: Employers don’t have time for slackers. If you have any ambition whatsoever, then I advise that you become accustomed to being unemployed as quickly as possible. In order to get a decent paying job in this country, your resume will need to look like something out of “Mad Men.” You need to be able to juggle multiple roles at once. Not every person can do this and frankly, most people don’t even try.
4. The Average Future Salary Is Terribly Low
This is important for two reasons. It is because the jobs are low paying and it is because the average young person graduates from Cornell with absolutely no marketable skills or experience. In order to connect with employers, you will be expected to either have internships at prominent companies, which provide some valuable experience but don’t seem like they are going to get you anywhere, or at least a few years of training before they actually hire you.
Those with marketable skills are hired and are compensated accordingly. In other words, if you can afford to go to Cornell, then do so. Many of you are doing so for the prestige and otherwise would be smart enough to know the value of a college education. I would like to remind you that employers do not care about your past academic history or any other personal achievement in life; they only care that you are able to keep their offices clean, food stocked, and an endless supply of coffee and lattes ready at all times.
5. The Future Is Never What It Seems
The good news is that over time, you will learn to be resilient and resourceful enough to make it work. The bad news is that there will never be enough jobs for everyone, so the only way to survive is to cut corners. This means doing anything and everything to sell yourself to an employer, even if it means hiring someone else to do your job for you. Don’t believe us? Imagine this scenario: You graduate from Cornell with a business degree and you earn $25,000 a year. You have no idea what you want to do with your life, but you are willing to work in some low paying office job, the exact same way everyone else is.